Search Results for: blog why do you love your spouse

Words that have been Turned into Baby Names

What will you name your baby? That question is one that most parents take very seriously. Much consideration goes into choosing a name for a newborn. It is understandable that parents want their child to have a unique name. Perhaps this is why many parents in 2014 selected a random word as the name for their babies. Nameberry took a close look at the names parents gave to their babies in 2014. They put together a list of baby names that are words. In short, parents chose a commonly used word, that has a specific meaning, as the name for … Continue reading →

Finding Support from Your Friends

We’ve talked extensively about how important it is that we keep friends outside of our marriage.  And that doesn’t mean that we have friends who can’t also be friends with our spouses.  It just means that we look for emotional connections with more people than just our spouses.  I know it’s very true for me; my two best friends give me things my husband never could, and not just things like watching the six-hour BBC “Pride and Prejudice.” It’s a real romantic notion – both in the love and in the story sense of the word – that our spouses … Continue reading →

Three Ways to Control Impulse Buying at Christmas

The shiny decorations, the pretty lights, the wonderful smells, the bustle of shoppers, the increase in commercials, and the demanding kids all combine at Christmas to raise the risk of impulse buying. Many debt services report that the number of phone calls they get for help really drops off in December, as people put aside the idea of debt and just go ahead and spend. Of course, the calls in January are another story. These agencies often see their highest traffic then, as people find themselves in debt crisis. Don’t let this happen to you. Control your impulse buying at … Continue reading →

High-Tech Holidays

Christmas has come early for tech-savvy parents the world over: Pinterest has invented secret boards where you can feature all the goodies you want Santa to place big red bows on and stick under the tree this holiday season. Technically, the site limits you to three boards worth of gift ideas, but that’s plenty of room to showcase your must-have holiday wishes. If Santa is part sugar daddy, then Springpad may be better suited for your ever-growing gift list. The high-tech digital assistant allows you to organize your list, in addition to those created by your kids, parents, siblings, colleagues … Continue reading →

Why Marriage Keeps Your Brain Healthy

The next time your spouse drives you absolutely crazy, keep in mind that he, or she, is probably helping to keep your brain healthy. That is because the challenges that our spouses give us, along with the love and support, may actually be protecting our brains. In fact, according to a recent study, sharing a life with another person means that we are less likely to develop cognitive impairment than single people who are not married. The study took place in Scandinavia and included 1,400 men and women. Married people are simply less likely to develop dementia than single people. … Continue reading →

The Harmful “Him” vs. “Her”

I know that men and women think differently. My first impulse is to examine how much of that is natural and how much is a result of cultural conditioning, but that’s a study for another time, and really another blog. What I want to focus on today is the sort of “us” vs. “them” mentality that arises sometimes, and how that might affect marriages. I had to read “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus” for a high school health class. I found it abhorrent, and said as much in my paper on the book. I understand as much … Continue reading →

Living with Engineers: Tales of Efficiency

There are a lot of engineers out there in the world, and so there are a number of us married to them. Based on conversations I’ve had with other spouses of engineers, I’ve learned it’s not just me: it can be a unique, strange, and funny experience living with an engineer. The first thing you need to learn if you’re the husband or wife of an engineer is that your spouse will always think that their way of doing something, is the best way of doing it. The magic word is “efficient.” Learn it well, because you’ll be hearing it … Continue reading →

Someone To Be Proud Of

Sometimes I tell my husband I’m proud of him. I do it when he’s accomplished something really cool, like finishing grad school or laying down hardwood floor in our house. Other times I tell him when I feel that warm ache in my chest when looking at him. He’s a great person, the best in my opinion, and I am so proud of him. It feels a little strange to say sometimes, because it’s not the sort of thing we’re used to saying to our spouses. We expect to hear it from our parents, or tell it to our kids: … Continue reading →

Cat People vs. Dog People

I’ve already debunked the whole cats and dogs can never get along theory. What about whether you’re a cat person or a dog person, and what that says about your personality? I recently caught part of a NOVA documentary exploring that very thing, and I wish I’d seen more of it. The opening was full of cat people and dog people talking about the respective attributes of their favorite mammals, before examining what life is like at home for each of them. Although the concept was fascinating, I felt a little put out. What about me? I love dogs and … Continue reading →

His Needs, Her Needs by Willard F. Harley Jr.

This is truly my favorite relationship book. It really gets to the core of the problem, explains why things like infidelity happen and then give you tools to prevent it. The analogies in this book are great, for example, the Love Bank. They use the love bank to explain how when you meet someone and things are wonderful, this person is making deposits in your love bank. Eventually those deposits add up to a marriage. They also explain how certain things cause withdrawals from your love bank. In the normal course of marriage you will both make deposits and withdrawals … Continue reading →