When You Don't Love Your Husbandby Mary Ann Romans | More from this Blogger 02 Apr 2009 06:11 AM
The first question I had for her was whether or not she ever loved her husband. Many people feel as through the first flush of love and romance is gone, especially after kids. Most couples go on to develop a longer-lasting deeper love and fall in love with each other all over again. If this was the case for her, I would suggest that they go to couples therapy and get a chance to rediscover each other all over again and spend time together without the kids. My friend, in fact, revealed to me that she never was in love with her husband. That she married him because he was a good man, they got along very well together, and she felt the pressure to settle down and have a family. Over time, she thought she might develop feelings for her husband, but they never seemed to go beyond a warm friendship. While this makes the situation a bit tricker, I was ready to ask my next question. Did she feel that her life would be better off without her husband? While everyone has a right to be happy, she should really examine whether or not separating her husband and then searching for a new love would actually give her a happier more satisfying life. My advice to her, as a friend, was to explore every avenue before she decided to throw everything she had away in her marriage. The couple should go to counseling and especially work on sexual attraction issues, since the friendship between them was already there. They should rely on the strength of that friendship to communicate honestly and with kindness. What do you think? Mary Ann Romans writes about everything related to saving money in the Frugal Blog, creating a home in the Home Blog, caring for little ones in the Baby Blog and now relationships in the Marriage Blog. You can read more of her articles by clicking here. Related Articles: The Gift of Unconditional Acceptance For a Good Marriage, Avoid the Story Telling Learn more about Mary Ann Romans  Mary Ann Romans is a freelance writer, wife and mother of three children. She lives in Pennsylvania with her husband, the kids and a 16-pound cat. Relevantmarriage tags User Comments  Cameron Sharpe (8) 02 Apr 2009 08:52 PMYour story was extremely touching. Your expressiveness demonstrates what an incredible connection you had with this other person and I can sympathize and relate to every word. JoaquinS (6) 08 Apr 2009 02:37 AMIt would be better if your friend is honest with her husband. If she thinks that their relationship will never work at all, why will she prolong her agony? But since they already have a child, she shall consider the possible consequence of it. At her age, perhaps, she could just learn to love her husband. Remerber that if there's a will, there's a way. Anyway, just an additional information,chances are that you've never heard of perchlorate. Perchlorate is actually a naturally occurring compound. It's actually a salt, but it shows up in small amounts in nature, usually in areas that are incredibly dry, as it is very soluble in water. Recently higher amounts of Perchlorate have been showing up in drinking water and a few powdered baby formula brands. Perchlorate is used as a treatment for thyroid conditions, and introducing it in a system in which it wasn't needed can interfere with infant brain development. The EPA is looking into some payday loans to clean up the levels of perchlorate in drinking water supplies. doctorjanesmith (5) 28 Jun 2009 06:28 PMI have the same problem except we have no children. We separated for about a year, but the trouble is that my husband does feel that he loves me and I felt too guilty hurting him, so we got back together. But I still pretty much feel the same way. It's not even that I want to look for someone new, I just feel like it's better to be single than to be married to someone you don't really love. Let me know if your friend figures anything out. :( Community Tags love, marriage, Marital Advice, realtionships Discuss this article
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A friend of mine recently confessed to me that she just doesn't love her husband. She is considering leaving him, although she is unsure of the decision since this man is a wonderful husband and father. He has always been loyal, faithful, kind, and a good friend. What do you think she should do?
