What Sort of Marriage Is This?by Dale Harcombe | More from this Blogger 04 Jun 2009 02:54 PM This wasn't the piece I had started for today but when I saw a news article, I couldn't help but be astounded, outraged, sickened, horrified at what had happened in one marriage. How could any man do such a thing to his wife? What happened to love honor and cherish? Where are all the things we have been talking about in this blog site like mutual love, respect, acts of kindness, thoughtfulness, consideration, and encouragement? None of them are there. If you haven't read the article, it is about a man who arranged through an on line list for someone to come into his home and rape his wife at knife point. He is now facing first degree rape charges as well as other charges. And well he should! This all occurred while he was in the room. The report claimed, 'the woman was not seriously hurt.' Are we kidding? Not seriously hurt? What would such a devastating experience have done to her confidence, her psyche, her attitude towards men and marriage and the sexual act? Only those who have been raped, I suspect, know of the lasting impact such an event can have on a woman's life, attitudes and other relationships. What sort of man is this to use his wife in this manner? How different is this from my own experience and the principles set up in this blog? Not only has this man seriously impacted his wife's life and future but what about the children, who were in the house at the time. Who knows whether they heard it all? Children often hear and see so much more than we ever give them credit for. If this man could arrange something like this, what about this man's usual attitude towards his wife? Obviously it had to be lacking in love and respect. The children would have seen that and it will affect their attitudes to marriage and the way women are treated. This is just another example where one person's selfishness and perversely wrong attitudes have completely overrode his spouse's feelings and welfare. This is a far cry from what marriage should be like. Can you tell I'm outraged! I'll just bet you can. At the same time I find it hard to comprehend. Mick found is just as incomprehensible. Some of his comments were. 'The guy is sick! This is the person he's supposed to love honor and cherish and he treats her like a chattel for his own sick pleasure. And the sad thing is the law probably won't do near as much to him as he deserves.' There was more, but you get the picture. How someone could do something like that, we both thought. But perhaps that's the difference when coming from a background of parents who loved and cared for each other and being in a stable committed relationship where love and concern for each other is the overriding principle. Related blogs Respectful Relationships to Counter Horrifying Statistics A Little Spoiling Goes a Long Way A Different Approach to Valentine's Day Identifying Weeds in a Marriage Learn more about Dale Harcombe  Dale has a passion for books and writing. She writes in various forms, from articles to poetry to fiction for children and adults. Relevantmarriage tags User Comments Samual (11722) 04 Jun 2009 03:27 PMRapists get very very lax sentences here in the UK at least, I hope I never have to, but if a victim asked me, I would have to tell them not to report it to the police. Here you are treated as the criminal and your name is plastered everywhere, then when the police don't bother to investigate properly or find the person, you are deemed either a liar or a cheater too ashamed to tell your partner.  Dale Harcombe |
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