Two Imperfect People

by Mary Ann Romans | More from this Blogger

26 Mar 2009 03:56 AM

As spiritual people, we know that we are not perfect. We are merely human and make many mistakes along the way in our lives. Why then, do we tend to assume that our marriages have to be perfect?

When you are young and in love you tend to believe that a happy marriage means that the couple spends hours staring into each other's eyes, doing fun things together and always agreeing. This is probably because during courtship or dating, a couple tends to spend hours staring into each other's eyes, doing fun things together and always agreeing. Call it the honeymoon phase, the first blush of love or whatever you have it. Biology plays with us, and we tend to focus on how perfect our love is.

Marriage is really an imperfect union made up of two imperfect people. We each have our own opinions, backgrounds and quirks. No matter how compatible we are for each other, we have to recognize that imperfectness.

While it is helpful to have the same basic beliefs on the big issues, such as money, family, etc., spouses will have a tough time in life if their goal is to always be of the same mind in everything. Disagreeing is inevitable, and appreciating the differences is a wonderful way to realize how unique and special we each are.

Trying to have a perfect marriage puts so much undue pressure on a couple. You should be able to relax in a marriage and focus on working together rather than worrying about everything being perfect. Even telling your spouse that he or she is perfect is a lot for that spouse to live up to. A better approach is to believe that the two of you are perfect for each other and that no matter what difficulties come, you'll make the best of your imperfect marriage.

What do you think?

Mary Ann Romans writes about everything related to saving money in the Frugal Blog, creating a home in the Home Blog, caring for little ones in the Baby Blog and now relationships in the Marriage Blog. You can read more of her articles by clicking here.

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Learn more about Mary Ann Romans

Mary Ann Romans is a freelance writer, wife and mother of three children. She lives in Pennsylvania with her husband, the kids and a 16-pound cat.

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