Search Results for: blog top 5 worst ways to handle conflict in your marriage

The Elderly Teach “The Baby Borrowers” Lessons in Love

I may not have children, but last night’s episode of “The Baby Borrowers” was one I could definitely relate to: The teens had to care for the elderly. Since I’m fresh off my duty of caregiving for my mom, the episode struck particularly close to home. Even more so because one of the ladies was on oxygen and two others had suffered strokes. (Except only one, Hedy, was actually being cared for by a teen. The other, Reggie, was the wife of one of the men, George, who had volunteered to stay with a teen couple.) The only thing missing … Continue reading →

Five on Nagging – Stop Today

Some days it feels like the only way to get things done is to chase after the daughter and nag her or chase after the husband and nag him. As much as I hate being a nag, I know I’ve been one. Occasionally (really, really rarely) my husband thanks me for nagging because it keeps him on target and doesn’t let him get away with ignoring things to get done. That said, he doesn’t really like it when I nag and I don’t like nagging. We’ve worked out a lot of little ways we can communicate without the constant nagging … Continue reading →

Do You Want an Advice Column Here?

I have a question for our readers here in the marriage blog. The question, of course, is the topic of this blog – would you like to see an advice column featured here in the Marriage Blog. We address a lot of different topics and we do our best to bring you the most current news and information on a variety of different subjects with regard to marriage and relationships. Advice is a dangerous business though because advice is based on our opinions and how we would handle things and our own experience with the different topics. But relationship advice … Continue reading →

Don’t Ask for Help – Break the Bad Habit

Interestingly enough, my husband and I had an argument recently and the fruit of that argument was a revelation I wanted to share with our readers here. It’s a bad habit to ask your spouse for help on issues like household chores and activities. Why is it a bad habit? Because asking for help implies that if you don’t ask, you have it all covered and that this task is ours to ask for help on or not. The truth is, our responsibilities from household chores to financial responsibilities – they are shared responsibilities and have been since the very … Continue reading →

Marriage Tips: Never Settle Again

The hard part about marriage is sometimes you get into a routine and you get so busy taking care of the things in your life, that you forget to live your lives. Today is a day that you can change all of that. No, you’re not going to win the lottery. No, your problems are not all going to miraculously evaporate. What needs to happen, what will happen is that you resolve to fight for your lives and to live your lives in spite of the problems. Marriage Resolutions Think about how you spend your day-to-day lives. You are both … Continue reading →

Instinct: Our Fight or Flight

Human beings need a lot of things to feel alive. They need family, love, sex, but we only need one thing to actually be alive. We need a beating heart. When our heart is threatened, we respond in one of two ways. We either run or we attack. There is a scientific term for this: fight or flight. It’s instinct. We can’t control it. Can we? – Grey’s Anatomy When we’re married, our instinct for fight or flight can really get in the way of solving problems and relating to our spouses. When we are fighting or disagreeing with our … Continue reading →

Marriage Tips: Going to Bed Mad is Not Always Bad

You always hear that you should never go to bed mad. You should stay up and resolve the problems between you and your spouse. Arguments and disagreements are disruptive to a person’s health and their home. So how can going to bed mad be good – when we’re always told it’s bad? Consider for a moment, when you’re exhausted and angry, that you are in an emotionally charged state and that you are less likely to be reasonable or willing to be reasonable. In fact, the longer you try to settle an argument when you are that angry, the less … Continue reading →

Define Compatible in a Relationship

What defines a compatible relationship? We talked about the 5 most incompatible relationship types yesterday, so it seems somewhat appropriate to discuss what comprises a compatible relationship. There are three major components in a compatible relationship. These components include: Spiritual Physical Social These are the areas of self-definition and those self made definitions are important to your overall compatibility with another person. Spirituality has different levels of importance to different people. If you are a deeply spiritual person with very strong opinions and beliefs on holidays, prayer and baptism – then it’s likely you are going to be more compatible … Continue reading →

Old Wounds Can Damage Your Relationship

Have you ever found yourself still feeling resentment for something your spouse may have done years ago? Seriously, take a moment and reflect. Are there any old injuries or incidences that come to mind – something that makes your mouth tighten, your eyes harden and your temper flare? If so – the time to keep sitting on it is done. When you don’t treat an old wound, but keep it buried – you are doing more harm to your relationship than good. Old wounds are untreated sores that will continue to fester and discolor your present day experiences whether they … Continue reading →

Top 5 Worst Ways to Handle Conflict in Your Marriage

We talked about active listening earlier today and we’ve tried to offer a lot of suggestions on how to positively resolve conflicts and more. The following are the top 5 worst ways you can handle conflict in your marriage or in most other relationships. If you recognize yourself in the following descriptions, it may be time to consider alternatives in how you handle those conflicts. Going on the Defensive – The moment a problem is mentioned or an issue is brought up, you immediately go on the defensive instead of actively listening and hearing the problems that your spouse is … Continue reading →