Three Things Not to Do in a Marriageby Mary Ann Romans | More from this Blogger 05 May 2009 11:11 AM If you want to avoid divorce then you might want to avoid doing the following three things in your marriage. Spy Spying can break down the trust between a couple. And the person doing the spying should be prepared for the consequences, whether it is information that the spouse would rather not have or the conflict that arises when the spying spouse is found out. Here are some of the reasons that people spy on their spouses: They suspect infidelity They feel a right to know everything about the other person They wonder at too much time spent at the computer Instead of spying, attempt to communicate about the issue. Criticize his or her family We have all had those moments where we just want to go off on the audacity or ignorance of a mother-in-law, father-in-law, sister-in-law or brother-in-law. But, criticizing your spouse's family puts your spouse in an awkward position. Plus he or she may see it also as a criticism of self. Complain to a good and discrete friend if you must vent. Otherwise if there is something that truly needs to be changed, state the issue objectively and ask your spouse, "How can we solve this?" Make comparisons Women and men consciously or unconsciously see comparisons being made in different ways. A woman is more likely to become upset if a man flirts, not only because it shows some disrespect and there is an element of infidelity, but also because she may feel that there are comparisons being made between herself and the object of the flirtation. Men on the other hand may get upset when the are faced with the insecurity of being directly compared to another man, whether this is someone from the woman's past or just the neighbor down the street. The husband may feel that you are questioning his adequacy or abilities. Mary Ann Romans writes about everything related to saving money in the Frugal Blog, creating a home in the Home Blog, caring for little ones in the Baby Blog and now relationships in the Marriage Blog. You can read more of her articles by clicking here. Related Articles: How Facebook Could be Bad for Your Marriage Attack the Issue, Not Each Other The Gift of Unconditional Acceptance For a Good Marriage, Avoid the Story Telling Learn more about Mary Ann Romans  Mary Ann Romans is a freelance writer, wife and mother of three children. She lives in Pennsylvania with her husband, the kids and a 16-pound cat. Relevantmarriage tags User Comments No comments on this article yet. Be the first to comment! Discuss this article
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