There's No Room for Selfishness in a Relationship

by Lyn Newton | More from this Blogger

27 Mar 2008 11:33 AM

Marriage, dating, and any other form of relationships between two people can be complicated. Some people find it hard to work with others. They tend to look at the whole as it applies to them. They do not acknowledge how their actions or words affect others.

This way of thinking, I label as being selfish.

Selfish people have much difficulty carrying out healthy relationships. Much of keeping the relationship going depends greatly on one partner. That partner is doing more giving than the other. This scenario may work for a while. However as time goes by the partner that is being "dumped on" will grow unhappy and unsatisfied.

In a selfish relationship, one partner acts on behalf of him or herself rather on behalf of the couple. While we should do things for ourselves and things that make us happy, once we make a commitment to our partner we must no longer think of only ourselves.

When single it may have been completely acceptable to stay out a couple of extra hours. You may not have had anyone at home to be concerned about you. However once you unite your life with another, things are different. You cannot only think of the good time that you are having or the extra work that needs to be done. You must also think of the person expecting you home. How will the extra hours affect him or her? Being considerate and thoughtful of you mate only requires a simple phone call saying that you will be late.

In most cases, being thoughtful and considerate of your mate comes natural. When you love and care for someone you involuntarily think of them and their feelings. Love shows no selfishness. True love puts others before yourself. This is not a new idea. For this idea was established with the creation of our world.

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Learn more about Lyn Newton

Lyn is a kindergarten teacher and mommy to a girl and a boy. In her spare time, she enjoys informative and creative writing.

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