The Art of Sleeping Togetherby Dale Harcombe | More from this Blogger 28 Jun 2009 03:50 PM We hear a lot in the media at times about who's sleeping with whom. Usually though what they're talking about has more to do with sexual activity than it does with sleeping. While sexual activity is a joyful part of married life, the importance of which should not be discounted, there is something to be said for the simple joy of curling up next to another body in bed to sleep as well. One of the things Mick and I have done throughout our married life is to make a point of going to bed together. Often, but especially when children are small, this snuggling in bed together can be a time to the day's events, without little ears listening in. There's an intimacy in the dark that lets true feelings out and conversation flow easily. There's something comforting about being wrapped in each other's arms as you talk and prepare to sleep. It is also an ideal time to resolve any issues that have arisen. A helpful piece of advice Mick and I have always followed is never to go to sleep angry. So often that will mean talking through issues until a solution and reconciliation is reached. We don't get up together, as Mick is not as much of an early morning person as I am, but we mostly go to bed together. The rare occasions that Mick and I don't go to bed at the same time is when one or the other of us is not well and crawls into bed early or if one of us usually me) is so tired that staying up is impossible. Of course some times sleeping together takes a bit of adjusting When we were first married he would turn over in his sleep and I'd edge closer to keep with him, which was fine until I had him balanced on the edge of the bed, considering whether he'd get out and go around the other side and hop in there. But we've resolved that over the years. I still love to have his body to snuggle up to. I just don't push him to the edge of the bed any more. My advice to any couple is to make sure you go to bed together. It's an important habit to get into. I know Mick and I never sleep well if one of us is away and we are left to sleep alone, but even that happens rarely. There's something comforting and warming about having the right body next to you in bed. Would you agree? related blogs Keeping the Happily Ever After A Novel Approach to Marital Advice Dealing with Problems and Irritations in Marriage A Blind Date Leads to Love and Years Learn more about Dale Harcombe  Dale has a passion for books and writing. She writes in various forms, from articles to poetry to fiction for children and adults. Relevantmarriage tags User Comments carcour (15) 07 Jul 2009 11:25 PMI wish it was as easy as you make it sound. My husband can list a million excuses not to hold me .. the worst part is that they're all valid excuses. I know that it's hot and that he has to wake up early and that he has other more important stuff to do. I know that. but how can you tell a man you are not fulfilling my needs without hurting his feelings? and why would a man hold in all his emotions and desires after 6 years of dating, 2 years of marriage, and one baby! you can only ask for a hug or a kiss so many times before you feel rejected and humiliated. I have begged for it at times only to be told " it's ok.. just go to sleep" I'm still trying to be strong and keep my husband and my family because that's the right thing to do. Deep inside of me, i don't have the feelings i had for him once before, and other than our son, I can't find a reason to live, much less in this place.  Dale Harcombe (10126) 08 Jul 2009 02:09 PMIt sounds like you need some professional help in your marriage. Would your husband consent to counseling if you explain what a problem this is for you? Community Tags advice to follow, not go to sleep angry, sleeping together, talk over the day, talk through issues Discuss this article
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