Soul Mates?by Dale Harcombe | More from this Blogger 27 Feb 2009 02:38 PM
'A friend is one to whom we may pour out all the contents of our heart, chaff and grain together, knowing that gentle hands will take and sift it, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness, blow the rest away,' George Eliot said. You'd like to think our partners in marriage are that sort of friend and soul mate. But often they are not, so what can you do about it? Women are often more ready to talk about their feelings, dreams and problems than men are. Guys are often more reticent about sharing their feelings and if they suspect that they will be laughed at, not taken seriously or judged then they are even less likely to want to tell you want is going on. So, they need to know what they say will be accepted and treated with respect. Even if they do feel this, not all men will want to share their innermost secrets. If they don't, then we women have to respect that and not press them or hound them. Nagging doesn't work. More often it has exactly the opposite effect. Many people when pressed to do something that doesn't feel natural to them, will become more stubborn and dig their heels in and refuse to do it at all. On the times when he does open up about a work situation that is bothering him, or his dreams for the future, let him know how much you appreciate his telling you. You can do this in words or through any one of a number of actions that will convey the message. If he gets a positive response to what is shared, he's more likely to do it again. Please visit these related blogs The Gift of Unconditional Acceptance Learn more about Dale Harcombe  Dale has a passion for books and writing. She writes in various forms, from articles to poetry to fiction for children and adults. Relevantmarriage tags User Comments porterr7 (6) 28 Feb 2009 07:58 AMMen need to be transparent with their wives to achieve intimacy. This type of intimacy can be uncomfortable and there is a risk of rejection, but it is worth it. I learned to do it, to be comfortable with it, and to trust my wife with the real me. It has been a big asset in our marriage. www.marriagebythebook.org  Dale Harcombe |
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Is your spouse someone with whom you can share the innermost secrets of your heart and know you will not be judged, ridiculed or condemned? Is this what you are for your spouse - someone that he or she can always turn to - that they don't have to think before they speak how will they react if I tell them this? This is the freedom and 
