Search Results for: blog part 2 of top tips for communicating effectively

Drop From the Marriage Vocabulary

There are some things you never want to say to your spouse, because they are the type of things that can have serious effects. Three little words that should be dropped from the marriage vocabulary are, ‘never,’ ‘always,’ and ‘only.’ Imagine how your spouse feels if you tell them, ‘you never say the right things,’ or ‘you never do what I want.’ Now I’m sure if you thought about it long enough you’d realize what you mean is right at this moment you are not saying or doing what I want you to. If you tell them they never say … Continue reading →

Why Make Decisions Together?

Over the last couple of blogs we’ve looked at predetermining choices for spouses and family. I’m adamant making decisions together is a far better way to go in marriage. Why? Let me give you some reasons. It’s better for your marriage. Each person feels more involved in the choices made. It strengthens your marriage and you learn to take responsibility and learn from your mistakes together. Another reason is the responsibility doesn’t rest on one person. This can be come very stressful for the person responsible for always making the decisions. Of course it also means that if the decision … Continue reading →

Three Ms You Don’t Want in Marriage

Yesterday we looked at some Ms to incorporate into marriage. Today I’ve got three Ms you definitely don’t want in your marriage Manipulative We’ve all seen then the wives who manipulate their husbands with tears and emotional blackmail and acts designed to get what they want. We see it in those who manipulate their spouse into doing what they want when they want it, using sex or whatever other means at their disposal to get their own way. Manipulative people often use tactics to make the other person feel guilty, if they don’t comply. They use silent treatment or lies … Continue reading →

How to Deal with Stress

Stress is something that comes to all of us at varying times and in varying ways in our marriage. It can have detrimental effects, producing headaches, depression, overeating, high blood pressure, stomach upsets and constant minor illnesses because the immune system is low. From all the symptoms a young man experienced, he thought he was having a heart attack. The hospital found he was having a panic attack caused by too much stress. So for our health and for the sake of our marriages let’s find ways to deal with the stress. I’ve been reading Always Looking Up by Michael … Continue reading →

Finding The Perfect Mate

A little while back a 27 year old man from Tokyo married a Nintendo character. That’s right. This man said ‘I do’ to a video game creation. The character is called Nene Anegasaki, and is the star of a dating simulation game called Love Plus. Now I know what a sad state our society is in. According to the man, Nene is ‘better than a human girlfriend.’ He says she is ‘the perfect woman.’ And right there is the problem. He’s looking for the perfect woman. Well good luck with that. Little wonder a human being isn’t good enough for … Continue reading →

The Importance of Encouragement

It was really brought home to me once again recently the absolute importance of encouragement. Yes, I know I sound like a broken record (showing my age there!) but I after experiencing quite the opposite recently, I felt very deflated. No, it wasn’t Mick but a friend. By the time I’d been on the receiving end of a string of negative comments, I ended up wondering why I had bothered. Beth has covered this topic before in regard to toxic friends who undermine and leave you feeling bad about yourself. The thing is, I’m not sure the person even realized … Continue reading →

A Work in Progress

Yesterday I was talking with a young woman who describes herself as someone who only has ‘got her L plates in marriage.’ That’s right, the couple hasn’t been married long in terms of years and she feels she is still learning about marriage and that it is a learning curve for them both still, as they find the ideas that work and those that don’t. As she describes it, their marriage is still ‘a work in progress.’ It occurs to me that each marriage should be a work in progress. None of us should ever think we have all the … Continue reading →

Concentrate on Now

Recently a young woman made an insightful comment about the marriages and relationships of some of her friends. ‘They’re so busy looking ahead and planning ahead, they’re not dealing with now.’ I suspect this could be a common problem in many marriages, planning a future but not dealing with the present. So how do we combat this problem? The most important thing is to keep the lines of communication open each day. Perhaps one way would be something I saw once in a movie. I can’t remember what the movie was, but as the family gathered around the table for … Continue reading →

Get an A+ in Marriage

Do you want to get an A + in marriage? Here are a few As to help you relate to your spouse and improve your marriage Acceptance Your spouse needs to know that you accept them as they are and that you are not always trying to change them and make them over into something they are not. They need to know they are loved unconditionally, not only when they do the things that please you and make you happy. Admiration Admiration might be as simple as telling your spouse that an outfit looks hot on them. Or it might … Continue reading →

Part 2 of Top Tips for Communicating Effectively

Today I am continuing the tips for communicating effectively which I started yesterday. 7. Pick the right time One I mentioned the other day was about picking the right time. Not when your spouse is doing something else. We did have that conversation when Mick raised it the next day so he had heard it, and he was his usual encouraging and supportive self. Although sometimes driving on the car can work if you’re not in traffic and needing to concentrate a lot. It often works well with children and teenagers too, so long as they’re not the ones driving. … Continue reading →