Search Results for: blog on the same wave length

On the Same Wave Length

Are you on the same wave length as your spouse? Can you read the signs and body language without them saying too much? Yesterday we had such a situation. In the early afternoon I went out to my husband in the garden and said, ‘What are you going to do this afternoon?‘ He mentioned a few things that needed doing and asked me what I planned to do. I also mentioned a few things I needed to get to. The trouble was it was such a beautiful sunny day I didn’t feel like being stuck inside doing them. However I … Continue reading →

Spouses and Differing Spiritual Wavelengths

Sometimes you go on a spiritual quest that your spouse supports, sometimes you don’t. Sometimes you’re in the same spiritual boat as your spouse, sometimes you’re not. Because of the big changes our marriage has incurred recently due to my mom moving in with us, lately Wayne and I have been having a lot of discussions about my spiritual beliefs. Why just mine? Because Wayne has fewer than I do. Also, mine tend to guide my decisions, and Wayne doesn’t always agree with the decisions I make. (i.e. If you read my article in which I examined control issues, interpret … Continue reading →

Ask a Marriage Blogger: Are You Protecting Your Spouse or Taking Away Their Choices?

A few days ago, I received a private message from a reader and I apologize to her that I’m just now getting around to addressing this question. I have a question and you might be the right person to answer it. I enjoy reading your blogs and I find that many times we are on the same wavelength. A few weeks ago, my husband and I were talking about having children. We’ve been married for two years and his parents are very eager to become grandparents. He’s never expressed a great deal of interest one way or another before, but … Continue reading →

Getting Together

Every couple of weeks we get together with my husband’s side of the family. We all gather at the “grandparents” house. The adults have a chance to catch up and the kids (the two boys that is), run around trying not to be caught. The other afternoon was one such event. My husband’s brother and sister-in-law have two children: a boy who is three and a baby girl who is fourteen weeks. We have a little boy who is two and a half and a baby girl who is ten weeks. The boys are exactly ten months apart in age … Continue reading →

Be a Blessing

‘Having someone who understands is a great blessing for ourselves. Being someone who understands is a great blessing to others,’ says Janette Oke, author of numerous Christian romance novels. These words were on my calendar for today and I thought how apt they are for marriage. In marriage don’t all of us want that someone who understands us better than anyone else? It should work the other way as well we need to be the one who understands them too. We understand when they need time to process things that are happening and may not feel like talking just at … Continue reading →

Keeping Quiet

When you’re used to talking about things it’s hard to not talk. Lately I have been finding it difficult, as Mick has been reading my newest novel Streets on a Map. I found it hard to sit next to him, wondering what he was thinking as he was turning the pages, wondering how he was responding to what I’d written. I know other writers and their husbands and loved ones are their first readers while the manuscript is still in draft stage. I can’t work like that. Mick might get to see short pieces I’ve written and when I was … Continue reading →

Keeping the Lines Open

Silence is not always a bad thing. Sometimes you can spend time with someone you love, completely comfortable in their company without any words being spoken at all. But silence is not always good. In marriage it is important to keep the lines of communication open. How often have you seen a movie and the couple who are obviously long married are sitting in silence across from each other? How often have you also seen it in real life? The assumption is people who have been married a long time have nothing left to talk about. This morning Mick and … Continue reading →

Living with the Dreamer

If you are married to a dreamer it can have advantages and disadvantages. The disadvantages are that if your marriage partner is a dreamer, then one of you is going to have to take care of the practical everyday things that need to be done. The term dreamer can often apply to the creative type who has half their mind on the next piece of music they’re composing, picture they’re painting, story they’re writing or invention. Sometimes that creative world can become so real they forget about the real world and about maintaining relationships and spending adequate time with their … Continue reading →

Marriage in the Floodwaters

Every marriage encounters obstacles and hard times. The difference is some people are better at handling them than others. So you are stuck in the floodwaters, now what can you do? To continue the floodwaters analogy, you could just try treading water and wait till the waters subside. The trouble is you might just go under in the process. So what else can you do? The best solution is to try and find a way out of or around the problem. This is where being able to talk about to with your spouse and get to the root cause of … Continue reading →

Selective Hearing- What Can You Do?

Yesterday we looked at the issue of husbands and selective hearing. So what can we do about it, short of changing our men and trading them in for a newer model, which I admit is not something I’d ever consider. Firstly make sure what we want to tell them is something they’re likely to want to hear. For example if I talk about football, and I do, I know my husband will be interested. If I tell him about some new moisturizer, I’m sure I’d see his eyes glaze over. That’s a conversation better had with a female friend. Although … Continue reading →