Marriage Tips: Forgivenessby Sherry Holetzky | More from this Blogger 24 Jul 2006 05:57 AM Build a lasting and healthy marriage; means learn to forgive and to seek forgiveness when necessary. It doesn't mean excusing bad behavior or hurtful words or actions, but it does mean not allowing those things to create a wedge in our relationships. Giving forgiveness is really as much about you as it is about the person in the wrong. It's not about giving the other person a free pass, it's about allowing yourself to heal. By forgiving your spouse you can let go of hurt, anger, and even possible thoughts of seeking revenge. Getting back at your spouse really won't make you feel better, but forgiving him or her will. Seeking forgiveness is just as important. It tells your mate that you care enough about him or her that you feel the need to make things right. It shows that you love your husband or wife enough not to go on as if nothing happened, leaving him or her with hurt feelings. Admitting you're wrong, openly and honestly, and showing concern for your spouse's feelings will help you restore the relationship. We have all heard the saying, "don't go to bed angry." It is wise advice. Another good practice is to avoid leaving while angry or upset. Taking a walk to clear your head is one thing, but leaving for work, or on a trip, or taking off is never a good idea. If something unfortunate were to happen to one of you, you wouldn't want your last words or actions to have been in anger. Sometimes it takes a little longer to heal and to move on to forgiveness, but we should always try to forgive, especially when the other person is genuinely sorry and wants to make things right. If you need a little more time, say so, but don't leave your spouse hanging and feeling miserable any longer than necessary. A good approach is, "I love you, but that really hurt and I just need some time." Learn more about Sherry Holetzky  Sherry Holetzky is a work at home mom and freelance writer. Married to her best friend, Sherry and her husband are raising their family in a quiet rural setting in the beautiful Ozark Mountains. Relevantmarriage tags User Comments No comments on this article yet. Be the first to comment! Community Tags don't go to be angry, forgive, heal hurts, seek forgiveness Discuss this article
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