Search Results for: blog holidays and marriage part 2

Ditching the Husband to Hang with the In-Laws

The in-laws can be a dreaded part of the marriage experience, for some more so than others, and especially for the wife facing her husband’s family. I’ve had a little tension with Jonathan’s relatives, but overall my experience with them has been overwhelmingly positive. In fact, I don’t always need Jonathan around as a “buffer” or even just as an excuse, to spend time with his relatives. Jon’s part of a big family so there are a number of people with whom for me to interact. I first really hit it off with his older sister. We’re very similar in … Continue reading →

Friendship: the Foundation of Marriage

Last week my husband and I made cookies for breakfast. It is supposed to be healthier to eat a batch of cookies, or really any dessert, early in the morning rather than later at night. This way we have more time to burn off those extra calories. That’s not why we made them, though. We made them because the night before I’d experimented with making Pasta Puttanesca (not bad, though I think in the future I’d just swap the anchovies for tuna), and its smell still hung around the kitchen. I figured the best way to get rid of it … Continue reading →

Blundering into Fights — And Getting Back Out

Do you ever sometimes feel like you’ve somehow stumbled into a fight and are not sure how it happened? When we go looking to pick fights we know what we’re up to, but sometimes it seems like all of a sudden we’re fighting with someone and we’re not exactly sure how it happened. This can happen between any two people but it’s certainly common in a marriage, just given that married couples are two people who spend so much time together. The silver lining of picked fights is that, although when we go looking to start one we’re not exactly … Continue reading →

Holidays, Travel, and Family Expectations

Holidays can be tricky for anyone, in any family situation. Married couples without kids, however, face a special conundrum: with whom to spend the day(s)? Again, this can be tough for anyone, but childless marrieds face a particular pressure: you don’t have kids, so it falls to you to drive sometimes long distances to attend the family get-together. Of course that returns us to the initial question: with whose family do we spend the holidays? We pick one side of the family for Thanksgiving and the other for Easter, because Jon’s parents and my parents live far enough away from … Continue reading →

More Hollywood Splits Plus One Marriage

I just want to finish my “In Memoriam 2011” series, but celebs just won’t stop announcing splits. First up is Debra Messing. The “Will and Grace” actress announced she split from hubby of 10 years, actor-television producer Daniel Zelman. The two met while students at New York University and dated for years before making it official in 2000. They have a seven-year-old son, Roman. But, this breakup will be a bit like a Demi/Bruce one in that it seems to be terribly amicable. So much so that the couple have been separated for most of 2011, but still lived together. … Continue reading →

Still A Part Of The Family

Recently I was reminded of what co parenting looks like when the entire extended family makes it work. Being a single mom I usually only look at things from my point of view but this weekend I got the chance to look at this as a relative instead of the single parent. My best friend’s son and his wife are divorced, their son is three. I think that Sarah and Tyler have done a wonderful job of co parenting their son. This little boy seems happy, well adjusted and well loved. When he is with us he is the apple … Continue reading →

Tips for Creating a Happy Marriage

A happy marriage – isn’t that what all of us want? What can you do to increase your chances of a happy marriage? Here are some suggestions. You can often tell when a marriage is happy or when it is not. It shows in the faces of the couple as they look at each other and relate to others. It shows in the way they talk about their spouse. They don’t criticize and draw attention to his or her faults. Rather they draw attention to their loved one’s good points. They certainly don’t talk negatively about their spouse when they … Continue reading →

Adapting to the Holidays as a Married Couple

Our neighborhood held trick-or-treating last night to avoid going out on the Sabbath, and my kids had a ton of fun dressing up and heading out to collect their loot. I took them around, and my husband stayed home to hand out candy to those who came to our house. This is very representative of our personality styles. I’m the one who likes to go out and do things. I can more comfortably navigate my way through social circumstances, and because I’m the “mean” parent, I can herd four overly excited children up and down the street. My husband likes … Continue reading →

Holidays with Family

This is the last one, I promise, on the subject of holidays. This time it’s looking at holidays with family. It could mean just taking your children on a holiday but I was thinking more of holidays with in laws or siblings or other family members. A lot of how a holiday with family goes depends on how well the family gets along and how comfortable and relaxed they are in each other’s company. If your spouse doesn’t get along well with your parents, or even if you don’t, then a holiday with family is not going to be the … Continue reading →

Holidays and Marriage – Part 3

One of the biggest considerations for your marriage with a holiday plan is whether you are going to camp. For many families this is a cheap alternative. But unless you are the type of people who enjoy this sort of thing, then don’t even consider it. For Mick and me, camping would not be a holiday but a nightmare. I would rather stay home than go camping. Thankfully Mick feels the same. As a result we could probably count on or fingers, maybe even one hand, the number of holidays we have taken in our married life. And that’s okay. … Continue reading →