Do You Ever Regret Getting Married?

When a marriage takes a rocky turn, it’s not unusual for one or both partners to wonder what their lives would have been like if they had chosen not to get married. They might imagine themselves as swinging singles, successful in their careers, going out and partying every weekend without worrying over the little trivialities of life. But these are the wistful thinkings of a person who is unhappy in their marriage, rather than reality. Let’s take a look at some statistics. If you are married, you are likely to be more successful in your career, earn more, and have … Continue reading

7 Cs to Avoid in Marriage

Yesterday I wrote about 7 Cs you need in a marriage. Today I’m going to concentrate on 7 Cs you need to be wary of and try and eliminate in a marriage. Complacency If you have a good marriage the temptation could be to become complacent and think you have it made and so no longer have to work at you marriage. Nothing could be further from the truth. Complacency is a slippery slope to other problems. We never want to take a good marriage, if we have it, for granted. Complaining Some people just seem to have a knack … Continue reading

Teaching Kids to Take Charge of Their Own Happiness

I know that there are many of us who read this title and wonder how on earth can we teach our kids to take charge of their own happiness when we may still be trying to learn how to do it for ourselves! It can be a joint lesson to learn how to stop blaming and interpreting that the happiness is something that comes at us from the outside. It can also take years to learn this valuable life lesson, but as parents we can start our children on the road to happiness… We can point out to our children … Continue reading

What Have I Done to My Marriage? – Part Two, The Meltdown

In a previous article I wrote about some behind-the-scenes drama I’ve been enduring with the big changes in my marriage. Drama that could have threatened it even this early on in our new arrangement–-if I’d let it. I’ll get to the part about the salvation strategies I employed in another article, but first I’ll give you an idea of why I needed to call on them at all. Honeymoon’s Over Today marks a week and a half since my mom and I returned home. (Well, to my existing home and what is becoming her new one.) The first few days … Continue reading

To Commit or Not to Commit

Is it fair to ask someone to make a choice? Is it fair to say, if you’re committed to me, you can’t maintain your relationship with the someone else? The answer to this question is not as simple as it may seem. When you make the decision to commit to a relationship, you cannot keep your toe in the water of another relationship because you are still nursing feelings for your ex. So if the person you are involved with wants that commitment, but you are not ready to make it – then it’s time for the two of you … Continue reading

Lessons from an Arranged Marriage

Do you know anyone whose marriage was arranged? I do. I have good friends who are Laotian. He saw her at the grocery store and saw that she was respectful to her parents, was kind and compassionate and decided that he wanted to marry her. So he had his father meet with her father and they agreed on a price to pay for the dowry. And voila–they were married. She of course, agreed to the union as well. It may surprise you to find out that all this happened in the United States and within the last ten years. My … Continue reading

The Marriage Blog Week in Review: November 11-17

Is it really Saturday already? It seems kind of crazy that we’re already here, when I was just writing up the week in review last week. But here we are. It’s been an eventful week here at the marriage blog as we approach our first anniversary, we also crossed the 1,000th post line and Sherry and I continued our point and counterpoint in Marriage Debates. You’ll see changes taking place over the next week as we close in on Thanksgiving with a little re-organization and the adding of topics here and there. As always, we want to hear from you … Continue reading

When They Won’t Say Anything

It can be deeply frustrating to be married to someone that keeps everything to him or herself. It can be a particular sore spot if they keep a tight lid on what’s bothering them and choose only to share those things that they are happy about. When your husband or your wife isolates in this fashion, it can feel like it takes an act of Congress to get anything out of them. It can also take an emotional toll on the couple as they struggle to communicate across a vast gulf of all the things they never say. How to … Continue reading