Do You Really Need a Piece of Paper? If Not, Chill!by Courtney Mroch | More from this Blogger 19 Feb 2008 10:48 AM I've had this topic on my radar to write about for a while now. (Ask my fellow co-blogging buddy Lyn, who used to benefit from receiving monthly topic lists from me. I think this idea has been on there ever since September when I first was assigned to Marriage.) But it was a Newsweek article Families.com family member JadeWalker pointed out to me that finally got me off my duff to write about it. I respect people who don't go through all the motions of getting married. You know the ones I'm talking about. They don't have the ceremony, they don't even go to the Justice of the Peace. There's no dress, no party, no hubbub. They simply are together. I have several friends who fit this bill. They've all been with their significant others for over 10 years. It works for them. But the woman in the article Jade sent me irked me. The article was entitled "Yes to Love, No to Marriage" and was written by Bonnie Eslinger. From what I could gather in the article, she's been with her man three years. They've bought a house together and have every intention of sticking together for the long haul. But his family keeps pressing for marriage, which upsets her. Ms. Eslinger went on a rampage of reasons why she doesn't need marriage. Mainly it's because she's an extremely independent woman who views marriage as an entrapping institution and somehow associated negatively with religion. "Yet I do not need a piece of paper from the state to strengthen my commitment to Jeff. I do not believe in a religion that says romantic, committed love is moral only if couples pledge joint allegiance to God." ~-Bonnie Eslinger, Newsweek, January 14, 2008-~ In my opinion, she seems extremely hung up on society's views of marriage and how religion sometimes factors into it. To an extent she was offensive because she was so defensive of her views, which left her article riddled with hostility. Which was a shame. Instead of coming across like, "Hey, this is another way to live your life with someone special" and giving couples another option to consider, she didn't. She turned the whole matter into a debate about a right way to marry versus a wrong one. (Or not to marry, as is her case.) Rule Number 4 comes to mind: One size doesn't fit all. Someone needs to tell Ms. Eslinger that. And let her know it's okay to not ever be a bride if she sees fit. Click here to read the full article. Related Articles Understanding Ourselves: Why We Get Married Did You Commit to Marriage Before You Even Were? Learn more about Courtney Mroch  Courtney Mroch is a wife, a proud pet parent, and a writer. She's been with her husband, high school sweetheart Wayne Pryor, over 20 years, married 11 of those. She's "mom" to Mr. Meow, a.k. Relevantmarriage tags User Comments No comments on this article yet. Be the first to comment! Community Tags Bonnie Eslinger, deciding not to marry, marriage, newsweek Discuss this article
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