Battling Demons: The Green-Eyed Monster

The jealous are troublesome to others, but a torment to themselves. ~-William Penn-~ Are you a jealous person? I am. Or used to be more frequently than I am now. For the last ten years or so I’ve been in a recovery program of sorts. Not one associated with any particular group. Just one devised by applying wisdom I’ve stumbled across in regards to my problem. Because jealousy is a problem. Or can be, if left unchecked. Once upon a time, back when Wayne and I were first dating, I didn’t check my jealousy very much at all. I let … Continue reading

Dilemmas: Friends and Inappropriate Behaviors, Part 2

In Part 1, I wrote about some sticky situations friends might put us in (knowingly or unknowingly). Ones that can cause dilemmas when deciding how to handle them. I promised my answers for what I would do, so here they are. If a Friend Knew My Husband Was Cheating Ideally, I’d like to have my spouse make the confession. So if my husband was cheating and a friend knew, I’d like the friend to confront Wayne and encourage him to tell me. But if that didn’t happen, I’d want my friend to show me irrefutable proof. I would be the … Continue reading

The Curious Case of Sister-Wives

The other night I stayed up late watching TV because I couldn’t sleep. I ended up tuning into a show called “The Secret Lives of Women.” Apparently the show’s a series and features insight into different aspects of women’s lives. The night I watched the topic was polygamy. I have to admit, other than what I’ve seen from the media, I don’t know much about polygamy. I knew the concept of multiple wives sprung from religious beliefs, but I’ve never understood why any woman would sign up for that type of marriage. (Unless if she was forced into it, like … Continue reading

Thoughts on Polygamy

With the raid on the polygamist compound in Texas headline news lately, I’ve been thinking about polygamy probably more than I ever have before in my life. The Husbands Watching the news, I’d be led to believe that the husbands in polygamist unions are all abusive, dirty old men who use religion as justification for having sex with young girls. Maybe some of them do. But what about the ones who don’t? What about the ones who have committed themselves to many wives because their religion ordains it and they firmly believe in their doctrines? How do they emotionally and … Continue reading

When a Stalker Intrudes on Your Relationship…

…it can be really uncomfortable. First let me define what I mean by “stalker.” I’m not talking about the crazy knife-wielding, if-I-can’t-have-you-no-one-can kind. (I imagine it’s a lot more than just “really uncomfortable” dealing with that sort.) No, I’m referring to the kind of people who take a sudden and very keen interest in you or your mate and are conveniently everywhere you are at the same time, or call all the time, or email…you probably get the gist. This thankfully hasn’t happened to Wayne and me in a while now. But he and I have both had a stalker … Continue reading

Even Rock Star Wives Sing the Blues

One afternoon not too long ago as I was folding laundry I was watching True Hollywood Story: Rock Star Wives. It was sensational. Some of the rock stars profiled included Dee Snider (Twisted Sister), Alice Cooper, Duff Mckagan (Guns N’ Roses, Velvet Revolver), Slash (Guns N’ Roses), and Vince Neil (Motley Crue). Both the wives and the rock stars were surprisingly candid about the trials and tribulations their marriages experienced. What struck me most was how so many of the marriages had encountered every kind of worst case scenario imaginable. And I’m not talking about just one kind of worst … Continue reading

Rule Number 1: No Such Thing as a Perfect Marriage

Since I decided my focus for 2008 would be resolving to make the best of marriage, I have to start somewhere. Setting rules seems like a logical place. Perhaps the most important, fundamental rule is realizing perfection is a myth. Nobody, and No Marriage, Is Perfect I don’t believe in such a thing as the perfect marriage. Everyone has flaws, therefore every marriage will have flaws. That’s not to say you can’t enjoy an incredible marriage though. That’s always something you can strive for. As long as you do the following: (a) Accept It, Flaws are Inevitable If you accept … Continue reading

Thoughts on Long-Distancing It: Breakdowns Are Inevitable

Yesterday I wrote Thoughts on Long-Distancing It: How Commuter Marriages Are Born and told how Wayne and I have had a long distance marriage going since July. I also wrote about Friday Night Lights and Tami Taylor, a character on the show going through the same ordeal. It’s not easy being separated from your spouse. It is easy for tempers to flare to extremes, though. In some cases quickly, in other cases they simmer before exploding. Here’s two examples of what I mean: Example One: Tami’s Meltdown While her husband, Coach Taylor, is away trying to adjust to his new … Continue reading

The Most Romantic Things My Husband’s Ever Done for Me

Over in the Family Life / Marriage & Relationships / Marriage Enrichment forum a member posed this question “What’s the most romantic thing your spouse has even done for you?” The question was actually posted about a year ago, but it gets updated by other family members from time to time. Such was the case late last week when another family member wrote about a lovely Valentine’s gift her husband delivered to her one year as a surprise upon waking. Well, it got me to thinking about all the romantic things Wayne has done for me over the years. Two … Continue reading

Can Married People Have Single Friends?

Of course! But it’s not always easy. By nature, single people and married people lead different lifestyles. Case in Point The other day I wrote about my single fantasy and how I’m sort of living it at present due to the fact Wayne took a new job out of state and we’re currently separated until the house sells and I can rejoin him. Well, in some respects Wayne’s living his own single fantasy. He’s bachin’ it up eating out every night, doing whatever he wants after work, and hanging out with friends as much as possible. We have a lot … Continue reading