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Arguments: Are Yours Good or Bad?

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I have never known two people that spend a significant amount of time together and never have an argument. While it is true that some partners argue much less than others, there are times in everyone’s relationship when differences arise. I can recall one episode of Friends when Monica and Chandler were dating. After their first fight, Chandler thinks that the relationship is over. Monica has to reassure him that an argument does not mean the end of the relationship. While a few arguments are no reason to end a relationship, there are times when fighting can get out of … Continue reading →

Do You Want A Financial “Do Over”?

Does the state of your family’s finances make you want to throw your hands in the air and shout “do over!”? Sometimes, feeling like you are starting fresh can give individuals, couples, and families the motivation and inspiration that they need to get their finances back on track. If the idea of a fresh start appeals to you, here are a few tips that you can try. Whether you are taking a fresh start for your personal finances or working with your spouse to start your financial life over together, one very powerful thing that you can do that costs … Continue reading →

Can’t We All Just Get Along This Christmas?

Christmas is just around the corner. Many families have a tradition of spending Christmas Day together. Presents will be opened, dinner will be served, and alcohol will be passed around. All this togetherness can be an excellent opportunity to connect with your relatives, especially the ones whom you do not get to see very often. Unless, of course, your family doesn’t get along with each other very well. Let’s face it, there are a lot of us who are dreading having to spend all that “quality time” with family members this Christmas, because we are anticipating that there will be … Continue reading →

Waking Up On The Wrong Side Of The Bed

Almost everyone has probably heard that expression before. You feel grumpy or are having a bad day and someone says, “What’s wrong with you? Did you wake up on the wrong side of the bed?” Although it doesn’t really matter which side of bed we crawl out of in the morning, you can always tell when it’s going to be one of those days. Is it simply our mindset or a sixth sense when we awaken and can almost feel that gray cloud hovering above our heads, warning us that today will not be a good day? As you stumble … Continue reading →

Protect Your Spouse

When you think about protecting your spouse what do you think of? Protecting them physically or protecting their reputations and best interests. I know for example that I’m never likely to be called upon to protect Mick in a physical sense although if called upon to do so I would certainly try. But since he’s so much stronger than me it’s not likely to happen. However I make sure I protect him in other ways and the ways you might want to think about and see if you protect your spouse. For example even if we have an argument I … Continue reading →

How to Fight Fairly

Marriage comes with arguments even with the most loving couples. Two separate people have two separate opinions sometimes. Fighting while not pleasant isn’t necessarily bad for you marriage, as long as you fight fair. Here are some tips. Never Hit Below the Belt As the person closest to your spouse, you have some a pretty lethal arsenal of weaponry that you could potentially throw at your spouse in times of anger. But hitting below the belt on sensitive topics will only betray the trust your spouse has for you, not win the argument. It is tactics such as these that … Continue reading →

Tips for Dealing with Argumentative Sore Spots

Do you have an argumentative sore spot in your marriage? You might even have more than one. So often in marriage we can think of the big issues like money, change, work, or family issues, as being the things we tend to keep on top of and try not to argue about. We might be really careful to discuss these issues and then find wham! It’s the little side issues that trip us up and cause to argue. I know for example, and Mick would agree, that we’ve never had problems talking about and coming to reasonable and logical decisions … Continue reading →

“Right Fighters” = Marriage Saboteurs

Yesterday I talked about how, among other things, the season for fighting is upon us. I also ended the article saying I’d examine some ways to fight fairly to ensure any fights you might have this holiday season are good ones, not just big ones –or, more importantly, rehashed ones. I’m actually going to start off by telling you a way not to fight. It has to do with the following quote and an article I wrote several months back about “Right Fighters”, a term I picked up from Dr. Phil. Attachment to being right creates suffering. When you have … Continue reading →

‘Tis the Season for Fighting

While Hallmark and Kay Jewelers commercials may try and lead us to believe this is a season of receiving romantic gifts and creating peaceful memories, anyone involved in a real-life relationship knows this can be a season for anything but blissful moments. The holidays add stress. There are extra errands to run, gifts to buy, parties to attend, and schedules to shuffle. Yes, amidst the chaos there are happy times or else no one would sign up for the seasonal celebrations year after year, but there’s also the potential for plenty of chaos and short fuses –and I don’t just … Continue reading →

Money in Marriage

The concern for many today is ‘Money, money, money’ to quote the Abba song. Yes we saw Mamma Mia a few weeks back, can you tell? With the current economic situation the way it is a lot of people are worried about money, coping with day to day expenses and the prices of basic items rising all the time, banks looking shaky and the share market in a slump. As well as those struggling to support families, it also affects those with retirement funds and investments as they see what they thought was a retirement nest egg shrinking before their … Continue reading →